Curious customs of Indian weddings

Tapestry of traditions, spirituality and love

Indian wedding traditions are as diverse as the country itself, offering a fascinating glimpse into the country’s ancient customs and contemporary practices.

Marriage, in India, is not just a union between two individuals but a coming together of families, cultures and traditions. The customs associated with weddings differ widely across the diverse regions of the country, reflecting the rich tapestry of India’s cultural heritage.

Whether it is the elaborate, multi-day celebrations in North India or the more intimate, traditional ceremonies in South India, every community has its own unique rituals that hold deep significance.

In the northern states like Punjab and Uttar Pradesh, vibrant and colourful wedding ceremonies take place with rituals such as the baraat, groom’s procession, pheras, seven circumambulations around the sacred fire, and mehendi or henna ceremony.

In contrast, southern weddings, such as those in Tamil Nadu or Kerala, might feature the traditional kanyadaan, the giving away of the bride, and tali tying, where the groom ties a sacred thread around the bride’s neck symbolising their eternal bond.

Each of these rituals, though varied, holds deep cultural and spiritual meanings that have been passed down through generations. They reflect not only the values of love, respect, and unity but also the importance of familial bonds, community support and the sacredness of marriage in Indian society.

The celebration of marriage in India is as much a spiritual journey as it is a cultural spectacle, where each tradition and ritual carries its own significance and beauty.

Kumbh Vivah – The ritual of wedding the river

In some regions, particularly in Uttar Pradesh, the most populous state of the country, there exists a curious tradition called Kumbh Vivah where a person, especially a woman, is married to a Kumbh, a sacred vessel or pot.

The ritual is believed to nullify bad luck, and the person gets rid of any malefic influences. It is a symbolic marriage to the river or water, and the marriage to the Kumbh is later followed by an actual marriage to a human partner.

Balancing Pots – South Indian tradition

In Tamil Nadu, brides perform a traditional ceremony where they balance a number of pots on their head while walking to the wedding venue. This delicate art requires perfect balance and is believed to bring prosperity and happiness to the couple’s future.

It is often performed during the wedding procession, showcasing the bride’s poise and strength.

Uninvited mothers of the bride and groom – Bengali weddings

In some Indian weddings, particularly in Bengali families in Eastern India, there is a peculiar custom where both the bride’s and groom’s mothers are excluded from the initial wedding invitations.

The belief is that the mothers are ‘too emotional’ and could disturb the balance or harmony of the event. They are, however, invited to join in the later ceremonies or to make their grand entry after the wedding begins.

Kashi Yatra – the groom’s spiritual journey

In a fascinating southern tradition, a groom pretends to go on a spiritual pilgrimage to Kashi or Varanasi, as though he is renouncing worldly pleasures and material life. He is then stopped by the bride’s father, who persuades him to marry his daughter instead.

The dramatic reenactment signifies the groom’s readiness to settle into marital life and symbolizes his transition from a bachelor to a married man.

Throwing the groom in the lake – Goan tradition

In some Goan communities, after the wedding ceremony, the groom is ceremoniously thrown into a lake or pond.

The tradition, which can be surprising to outsiders, symbolises the bride’s ability to “cleanse” or “purify” the groom before they begin their married life. It is a playful tradition with an underlying belief of washing away any negative energy before the marriage.